Friday, October 08, 2004

I want to be a Minority...

Whoa! You know what's fun? Our system of government. The shit is hitting the proverbial fan, dude(tte)s.

See, the Liberals presented their Throne Speech earlier this week in parliament. But then the Bloc presented an sub-amendment to the Speech from the Throne, supported by the Conservatives.

Now, the Liberals have declared that the vote on the sub-amendment -- which is taking place Friday -- is a vote of confidence, meaning that if it passes the government falls. Whether it passes or not depends on how sick two Conservative MPs are and whether or not the one independent Chuck Cadman decides to support it.

Anyway, the ridiculousness of all this is that if the government falls, it falls for no reason. And then we have an election all over again and the Liberals say, "The Conservatives got in bed with the separatists and forced an election!" and the Conservatives say, "The Liberals turned a vote on a sub-amendment into a vote of confidence and forced and election!" and every normal person in the country is like, "Excuse me? Didn't we just have an election last Spring? You're all absurd!" and then the Bloc and the NDP form a majority government, and the John Ralston Saul is crowned King of the Nation, and Sheila Copps becomes the Governor General's husband because the Supreme Court is pissed off that it has been asked to rule on the same-sex marriage reference when it should be up to parliament to pass such legislation, and then the Supremes get revenge by decreeing that all heavy-set women must become lesbians and something about Adrienne Clarkson being forced to marry only socialists from Hamilton as God intended.

Wait! Hold on. Late today, Prime Minister Paul Martin decided that the Bloc sub-amendment -- with a slight change -- was no longer a confidence motion.

Whew. That was close.

We're safe.

For now.

(And I didn't even get into the bizarre sidestory of how NDP leader Jack Layton accused the Conservatives and the Bloc of conspiring to make Stephen Harper Prime Minister today.)

Post-script

Also, Toronto police chief Julian Fantino is going to be on the cover of the next issue of Fab, a local gay magazine. [Star article.]

Has the world gone mad?

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