Monday, October 17, 2005

Monday Ménage à trois: Condoms and tampons and iPods, oh my!

1. Have you seen these ridiculous LifeStyles condom ads with the picture of a man and a woman with their heads on fire and the slogan "Condoms to Spark Your Imagination"? Worst advertisement ever.
First of all, what kind of marketting genius thinks that images of burning will sell condoms? I mean, here you have a product that you can legitimately sell with sex, and instead you choose to depict two heads in flames? If I had no fear of fiery pain, I wouldn't need your damn condoms...
Equally idiotic, the ad's secondary slogan "Your pleasure, it's all we have in mind." Good god! While I appreciate that you, LifeStyles condoms, have my pleasure in mind, it should not be your first priority and certainly not all you have in mind. I place your product on my you-know-what to keep away the babies and disease! Please keep them away! And not with burning!

2. Hey ladies. RE: the other you-know-whats. The NDP's Judy Wasylycia-Leis is working on it.

3. I purchased one of these iPod nanos over the weekend. It's my first portable mp3 player and, also, my first trendy purchase since... well, I'm not exactly trendy, let's say. Anyway, I enjoyed commuting with it, but I felt conspicuous and slightly embarrassed, like I did the first time I wore a pink shirt. And I noticed other people with white wires coming out of their ears like I never have before. Have I joined a cult? Discuss, Jack Shafer.

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