Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Heureusement, ici, ce n'est pas un pipe.

What kind of ads would you release if your political party was up at about, oh, 53% three weeks before election day? Why, yes! You'd release meaningless ads that will offend no one... Like these two new Bloc Québécois ads!

... Ads shot in soft focus by a director like Éric Canuel, whose films include the Genie-winning Le dernier tunnel, and also the upcoming bilingual comedy Bon Cop, Bad Cop, which we are all very much looking forward to. (No, seriously: It's about a hockey-related murder committed on the Ontario-Quebec border; Patrick Huard and Colm Feore play the French- and English-speaking police who team up to solve the murder.)

... Ads with no actual content, except a pregnant woman and several other Quebecois saying "Heureusement" over and over in front or behind of a ballot box in locations that you would expect to find polling stations, like in the produce aisle of a supermarket and a by a frozen lake.

Okay, well, there's a brief mention of the sponsorship scandal in one and families in the other, but on the whole they're really oblique.

If you're up at 53% in the polls, you might also want to say meaningless thihngs at your press conferences. Like, for instance, "The theme of this election is democracy," which is what Gilles Duceppe told reporters yesterday. Ah! Interesting. This donut is pastry-flavoured!

They say politics replaced religion in Quebec in the 1960s... That's certainly the assumption of these ads, which want you to believe in the Bloc and not ask too many questions about how the party is actually representing Quebec in Ottawa. Gilles Duceppe works in mysterious ways.

Bonus Bloc Bafflegab!

Duceppe was asked why the ads don't mention sovereignty, since that is his party's raison d'etre. His reply: "I mean, are [The Liberals] saying in their ads that they are a federalist party?" No... but that's because it's a federal election. Do I need to explain the difference further?

Oh, never mind. You had me at the pregnant woman... Heureusement. Heureusement. Heureusement. (Scandale des commandites.) Heureusement....

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